Yikes. This topic is pretty heavy. How DO you recover lost trust? I’ve never been able to. Once it’s gone, it’s gone. There’s no going back. You can never again say that you truly trust a person who violates that confidence. How can you? “Oh I know I believed in you before and now that you’ve proven that you think very little of me and my friendship/partnership/relationship I think I’ll continue this totally illogical faith I have in you”-ummm, no. I don’t think anyone truly feels that way although many people would like to believe they can forgive and/or forget. I can do neither. I can try to ACCEPT what’s been done and if I’m not able to do that, well, whatever was between us before will be dead. Sad, isn’t it? But honestly, if you were the transgressor would you really want to remain in any kind of relationship with someone, whether it be intimate or business, who no longer trusts you? Your best bet is to fess up to whatever shitty thing you did and just move on. If you can’t be an honorable person in your dealings with certain individuals it might be best to seek out more like-minded folks. That way you can be yourself instead of being sneaky.
I feel an overwhelming need to disclose the fact that I’ve been untrustworthy to more than one person. I’m not proud of it but it’s a fact. I’m no longer in contact with any of the individuals I wronged. I followed my own advice and after spilling the beans I left the situation. I hate even remembering those moments and still feel incredibly guilty about them. I AM happy that there’s nothing untrustworthy I’ve done that isn’t out in the open but I’ve lost some good friends. I’ve also learned a lot of really great lessons. Be a good friend, be honest, open up, share, talk, trust, have honor and just be a decent human being.